Parallelogy
I would just like to say for the record that I AM the best. The very very best. Parallel parker in Texas. No. In the USA. No. In this continent. No. Still not enough. In the WHOLE WORLD! O' I can't even begin to fully express the depth of my knowledge in parking of the parallel-persuasion.I'm so good at it that I could make a date out of it. "Man, this chic is really cocky," you say? No, really. I can see it now: he'll ask me, "where do you want to go Becca on Saturday night?" And I'll reply, "Let's totally go parallel parking!" And he'll say, "Huh?" And I'll say affirmingly, "Oh, yeah. You mean you've never gone parallel parking on a date before? You sooo don't know what you're missing!" And then that Saturday we'll go parallel-parking and I'll show him the geometric sequences and mathmetical-trigonometric identities that go along with going in at the right angle and the dos and don'ts of choosing the perfect quantitative space between cars and so on. The date will be soooo fun and successfull that it will most likely end with a sweet kiss. I could totally pull that off.
I first realized my gift upon getting my liscense for the very first time. I got a perfect 10 on the parallel parking test on my first attempt ever. But then I began to notice that no matter the space (big or small) and no matter the car (Huge truck or little Geo), I was able to snuggle in swiftly between two cars on the very first try. It was miraculous. Tantamount to, well, miraculousness.
I'm thinking of even majoring in it. Possibly getting my doctorates in "parallelogy"-the study of parallel parking-you've probably heard of it by now-and then teach it at the college level. I think people would sign up for it. I really do.
Anywho, I'm a pro needless to say. At parking I mean. Of the parallel type. Now regular parking? That's another story. You'd think if you can do one way you can do the other. But this is most definitely not the case. (If you were wondering). ;-)
posted by Becca @ 12:51 PM
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